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SELECTED STORY: WHAT A FAITHFUL GOD!

“Here I am 10 years later, living life in His goodness, and telling what the Lord has done for me!”

Anonymous
Exactly 10 years ago, I began to suffer with mental health problems, experiencing deep depression, anxiety and panic attacks. The feelings were intense and extremely debilitating to the point where just getting out of bed and getting dressed was a huge challenge. After months of continuous suffering, thoughts of suicide became appealing just because I so badly wanted to stop the feelings of mental torment.

During this time, being part of church life went from being the thing I loved to the thing I hated, but I knew I had to keep going, to keep connected to my church family, to not isolate myself.

Reading the Bible, God’s precious word, which I had loved doing before became nearly impossible to me; a verse was about all I could manage in a day.

One verse became a declaration of truth over my life against the suicidal thoughts: “I will not die; instead, I will live to tell what the LORD has done” (Psalm 118:17 NLT).

Here I am 10 years later, living life in His goodness, and telling what the Lord has done for me!

Did I seek prayer for healing? Oh yes. Nearly every week I went to the front at the end of a Sunday meeting, desperately wanting God to heal me. Did he not hear those prayers? Did he not want to heal me, His precious daughter? He heard every prayer and gently freed me but not in an instantaneous way.

I have spent the last 10 years replacing lies with truth. Do I still suffer? Unfortunately, yes. But I text my friends to let them know I am struggling, and they faithfully stand with me in prayer. What a battle, and what a faithful God!

In recent years, God has used my experiences to help me support others as they walk through the tough path which is mental illness. My life, just being alive, is God’s glory on display!

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